Let's be honest

Life has so many ups and downs.  For most of my life I handled the downs pretty well, or so I thought.  Maybe I just fooled myself to think that.  I have struggled with my weight pretty much all my life.  I bet I can come up with 50 reason why that is, but the truth is none of them matter.  But to give you a little back story I was able to deal with it no problems.  I was very self assured and confident, no questions asked.  The about 2 years ago my husband and I started the process of adoption.  Due to an illness and a child and into adulthood I am unable to have biological children.  The process is a very intrusive process to be honest.  You feel as if every aspect of you life is picked through.  Then to top it off you are more or less placed in a popularity contest, so but that is what it feels like.  Who has the best job, who has the nicest house, who is prettier, who has more money.  It may not be the way it is intended to be, or come across but that is how it feels.  And after being listed with an agency for a year and not getting emails and phone calls returned and our profile going up picked it made it worse.  My insecurities were getting worse with each passing day.  As I am sure you guessed by now that we did get picked by an amazing woman, that is another story for another day. 
Needless to say that is just the beginning of the stresses in my life.  My husband has been out of work for almost a year with no potential job in sight.  We are having some extended family issues and some other issues that just seem to add to things.
So this is my plan to try to deal with one issue at a time and not feel so bad about putting something on the back burners.  Because the people who really care about me will be ok with me caring about myself for a little bit....right?